Visit from the Reeds

Paige was so happy to spend time with Brighton

Erin greatly enjoyed Michael and Rochelle's company

Finally went to Angelina's famous hot chocolate cafe

Paige making sure she gets every last bit of whipped cream

Miniature France

Low point

This morning was the low point of my time in Paris.

Clay has continued to be our biggest challenge so far and unfortunately things are trending worse and worse for him. His behavior at home has been beyond words. The only silver lining is that he's been fine at school. It is difficult to imagine the implications if that should change.

If we were back home, I think we would be in a better position to deal with his behavior. But here it adds to the stress of living and working abroad.

The latter is particularly difficult for me. Over the last couple of weeks and particularly with my trip back to Seattle, I've repeatedly received the message from my colleagues at work -- sometimes directly, sometimes between the lines -- that people generally aren't happy with what I've done. They see it as having a negative impact on their work lives and being a negative for the company.

This puts an extra burden on me to "prove" that working from Paris can be successful. It means taking those extra calls in my early mornings and evenings which overlap with Seattle. It means taking the extra trips -- back to Seattle, to the Middle East, within Europe -- to stay connected to our employees and customers and  to help with our sales and business development efforts.

All of this would be fine if Clay was his normal self. But since he isn't, it has a real impact on my work. I canceled a trip this week so I could be home and help Erin with him. There is another trip in a couple of weeks which I should attend but may not be able to. And my calls in the evenings and mornings have a negative impact on the family as they are during his challenging times (i.e., when he is awake and not at school).

This combination of work and home challenges is a bit of a negative spiral where I feel like I am failing on all fronts. Thus the low point. And while I know it will get better, it is difficult to see that path from where we currently stand.

Home

I returned yesterday from my first trip back to Seattle since we moved to Paris. The trip was work-related and went from a Wednesday to the following Tuesday. And since it spanned a weekend, it also allowed me to mix in a bunch of personal stuff.

Much time was spent on packing a couple of duffel bags full of items that we intentionally left behind in August knowing that I would be back in September or October. Much of this was fall and winter clothing. It also included a bunch of items that are difficult or impossible to get here -- Best Foods mayo, peanut butter, ziploc bags, Miralax, baking powder, etc. Fortunately it all made it back to Paris in pretty good shape, aside from the mayo that couldn't withstand the pressures of high-altitude flight and somehow burst out of the jar. Luckily I had the foresight to pack it inside a plastic sack.

Too much time was spent dealing with the month's worth of mail that had accumulated. A few bills that I hadn't been expecting needed to be promptly paid and a confusing series of communications from Allstate regarding our landlord policy had to be deciphered.

But it definitely wasn't all work and no play. I spent the weekend up at Suncadia, went golfing with Derek on Saturday, met Mom, Dad, Ty, and Kyra at the Puyallup Fair on Sunday, and attended the now-famous Seahawks-Packers Monday Night Football game. Along the way I consumed Northwest and autumn staples such as Ivar's Clams & Chips, candy corn, Gravenstein apples, an onion burger, a Krusty Pup, fresh fair taffy, and a host of scones.

It was a productive trip from a work standpoint and a fun trip from a personal standpoint. It was great to spend time with my family and see my colleagues at work. But, that said, I really missed our new home. I didn't look around Seattle and say "I really miss this". Instead, I was so anxious to get back home to Paris.

It'll be interesting to see if/how/when that changes with my subsequent trips.

Disneyland Paris – Le Parc

As you enter Disneyland Paris, you step into Main Street USA and you would never know you aren’t in Anaheim. The shops, the music, the American flags, the Disney characters, it is all the same.

But then you start to notice the differences. The first ride we went on was Pirates of the Caribbean. The ride itself was the same, as far as I could tell (although it felt a little shorter), but the fun thing was to hear the pirates shouting and singing in French. It totally worked but I kept wondering how it sounds in Disneyland Tokyo.

The park itself is quite a bit smaller than Disneyland, with fewer rides – no Splash Mountain, for example. But most of the big ones are there – Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, Space Mountain, Indiana Jones, Buzz Lightyear, Autotopia, Star Tours, etc.

We grabbed our Fast Passes, hit as many rides as we could on a warm, busy day and had a great time. Clay absolutely loved Big Thunder Mountain Railroad and both kids enjoyed being the drivers on Autopia.

For about the cost of two visits, we purchased an annual pass so we can return during the holidays, explore the sister Walt Disney Studios park, and do a couple of afternoon/evening visits without having to feel like we have to get everything in.

Disneyland Paris – The Journey

Okay, back to the fun. Last Sunday we made our first trip to Disneyland Paris. In theory we walk five minutes to the metro station, take a four minute ride to the Charles de Gaulle / Etoile metro station, jump on the RER A towards Marne-la-Vallée, and about 45 later we are at the gate of the happiest place on earth.

Not this Sunday. As we made our way towards Marne-la-Vallée, the RER made an unusually long stop at a station and then absolutely stopped at the next station. We could barely hear the announcement but there was something related to an accident grave and people started piling off the train.

Given the number of people milling about the station, it was evident that this had been going on for a while and the odds of flagging a taxi in this small suburb of Paris were exceedingly unlikely. So, instead of just heading back to Paris or waiting indefinitely, we decided to head back just one station, get off, and try to find a taxi there.

So, we jumped on the next RER and shortly found ourselves in another suburban village. After a little walk to find a taxi (which was not successful) and stop at the local boulangerie, we figured out that there is a bus that would take us to the RER station where, according to the info we had, the RERs to Marne-la-Vallée were beginning again.

As we waited the 35 minutes for the bus, we saw that more and more people had this same plan. When the bus arrived, we amazingly all crowded aboard and stood shoulder to shoulder in this overloaded bus. The bus then proceeded towards the destination, somehow picking up a few more people at every stop. After about ten minutes, we got word that the ride would take an hour. This was a little too much for us to handle so we managed to squeeze out at the next stop.

We were now in another village with no clear way to proceed. But then we spotted a taxi stand with a taxi waiting. Unfortunately, it was just the taxi and no driver. There were also a couple of men staking claim to the taxi in the event the driver returned. So, we hung out for a while with the plan to catch the next bus going the other direction and then catch the RER back into Paris – or towards Disneyland if they opened up the line again.

Fortunately, the men gave up and a bit later the taxi driver showed up. About 20 minutes later, we were at Disneyland!

The journey was a good lesson in patience and problem solving. It also provided another example of French generosity. When we arrived, I handed the taxi driver 70 euros for the fare. He smiled and handed back 10 euros. He then turned down a fare from Disneyland Paris to who-knows-where and presumably headed back to his village.

Having fun?

A colleague from work sent a note yesterday asking if I was having fun. The easy response is “Yes, it is a lot of fun”. But that doesn’t really come close to capturing the experience and how we are feeling. This has definitely been fun but not in the same sense that going to Hawaii or Disneyland or vacationing in Paris is fun. This is fun like running a marathon is fun or climbing a mountain is fun. The fun parts are continuously being balanced by the damn hard parts.

As I fully expected, moving the family to a new country, with a language you barely (or don’t) understand, with new routines, a new school, different food, a small apartment to live in, etc. is difficult. There is no getting around that. If we wanted easy, we would have stayed in Bellevue.

And in some ways it has been easier than I expected. There have definitely been fewer tears so far than I thought. Erin has been amazing and has shown me the strength and patience in her character that I’ve realized I’ve taken for granted over the years.

Paige has been continued to be a trooper. She seems to be getting into a routine and has developed some close friendships. We have our first sleep-over tonight!

For Clay, though, it has been really hard. He dreads going to school each day. And it breaks my heart to hear from the teacher that he teared up in class. That just isn’t Clay. He is used to being a leader in his classes, a kid that works hard, listens well, never gets in trouble, and sets a good example. What must be going through his mind to be sitting there for six hours a day with a teacher that is only speaking to him in French and him not knowing what to do? If he didn’t care, it would be a lot easier.

I ask myself whether it is fair to put him through this (cue our refrain to Paige: “life isn’t fair…”). I’m confident that in a couple of weeks or months he’ll be much better adjusted and on track. Then this should be the positive life experience that we are looking for. I sure hope so.

I told my colleague that I’ve come to hate the fact that a lot of people probably think this experience is just about having fun. Hopefully that’ll be better understood and before long I can say without reserve “Yes, it is a lot of fun”.

L’appartement

We were lucky to find a 3 bedroom apartment near our school. The building is of the Haussmann style typical of Paris with wrought iron balconies. This style of building started in the late 1800's.  We're not sure of the age of our building, but hope it stands up a at least another year. We live in a nice area and it is fairly quiet in the building and on the street (except for the occasional loud music which makes you feel like you are in college again).  It is hard to get used to apt living. You feel like it is not very private if you have the curtains and windows open.  Right now from where I am sitting I can see 5 floors of windows.  You never know if the kids are being too loud. Our wooden floor is very squeaky which is noticeably loud at night.  But, we really don’t hear much from people above or below us so I guess we are okay.

Overall we seem to have enough space.  Paige actually has a bigger room than at home and the kids have TV’s in their room which Clay loves.  It is strange to have the toilet room separate and down 2 hallways from our room.  I often find myself about ready to get in the shower and then think wait I need to use the toilet.  Then you walk to another room to wash your hands.  The toilet rooms are basically tiny closets.  The bathrooms have been remodeled fairly recently. There is a really wide entrance hallway which runs the length of the apt.  It seems crazy to have this wide, long space that is not part of a bedroom or living room.  This is where we keep kids’ scooters, the drying racks, storage dresser etc.   The ceilings are tall and have decorative moldings.  We have to take the garbage to the dungeon.  It is a locked area in the basement.  It really makes you feel like you are back in medieval times down these curved concrete steps with short ceilings.  I worry about someone shutting the door and getting trapped.

The kitchen is tiny-about the size of an average bathroom.  The appliances are nice but very different from what we are used to.  Duane calls it “man vs machine”.  It took him about 10-15 minutes to figure out how to run the stove.  I have used the oven a couple of times but am still not clear on all the symbols.  And, I tried to set the dial to a temp but it really wasn’t hot.  So, I raised the temp and voila within 8 min fish was cooked.  I guess I won’t be making a turkey for Thanksgiving as it might be like that one episode on Cheers.

Every day I look at the washing machine and decipher a new symbol or change my mind about what I think it means.  For example, there are 12 different settings, some of which state the temp.  I still haven’t figured out if water temp will go below 40 degree C.  There is a spin speed setting and I think a spin time setting which I originally thought was temperature.  (Actually now I think it is the dryer setting.) Yesterday, finally figured out the 2 options for drying but it seems to be a steam heat so everything is damp when you take it out.  Thankfully the apartment came with drying racks.  There are a few symbols I am not sure about such as a picture of a closet.  Not sure if this means clothes are folded and put in closet?  Also, there is a hanger and chair or maybe it is a bed.  Duane thinks it might be the iron.  Not sure yet if Duane’s long pants will fit.

We are lucky to be on the second floor and have windows to the outside street.  Some of our bedrooms and kitchen open to outside areas in the middle of the building.  But even though it is open to the sky, the air is not very fresh.  Sometimes you smell the sewers and mold that comes with this humid city.  It’s definitely an adjustment but we are managing well and like our location.

Our front door

The view across the street

Our kitchen

Back to school

Yesterday was the first day of school for the kids. This much-awaited day had everybody on edge a little bit but the kids were troopers and came out of school with smiles on their faces. Even better, they went off to school today without a complaint.

In general, over the last few weeks, Paige had been looking forward to school and Clay had been a little hesitant. For him, that's standard operating procedure for the beginning of a school year -- as Oma, Papa, and Meme can all attest. (Preschool involved literally dragging him out of the car to the school.)

For Paige, she was looking forward to making friends. After three or four weeks with just her little brother, you can imagine how great it sounds to her to hang out with girls her own age. One of my favorite little moments from our Alps trip was on the Sound of Music tour bus when Paige was peaking around Erin with a big smile on her face as she was trying to catch the eye of a 10 year old girl from Germany that was sitting with her mother in the row behind us. I loved seeing my once-shy little girl reaching out like that. Later on the tour the two girls sat together and did their best job at a conversation. Erin exchanged email addresses with the mother so perhaps they will stay in touch and visit in Germany sometime.

Earlier this week we met with the headmistress of the immersion program at our school as she assessed both kids and then met with Erin and I. That went really well. Both Paige and Clay come into their grades with a strong set of skills so are set up really well. Clay was placed in a class with a combination of first graders and second graders. Likewise, Paige was placed in one with a combination of fourth and fifth graders. Each class has about fifteen kids from ten or so nationalities. (The headmistress said the immersion program as a whole has 65 kids with over forty different nationalities!)

The only problem with the meeting was that she told the kids that their teachers would only speak French in class. This understandably caused some concern with them and we had multiple conversations about the fact that all of the kids would be in the same boat.

We had a warm welcome at school yesterday and Clay greeted his teacher with "Bonjour. Comment vous appelez vous Clay" -- his attempt to introduce himself that resulted in "Hello. What is your name Clay". :) With hugs and kisses we were off and they got started with school.

Picking them up a few hours later they were both happy and shared the details of their days, which is normally hard to coax out of them. They both spent time in class learning about the nationalities of their classmates and getting introduced. They also both made friends. Paige has a new friend, Anna Sophia, from Mexico. Clay has a friend that he believes is from Egypt and whose name starts with "L" and ends with "Y" (but isn't Larry! -- "No Dad!").

La rentrée

La rentrée is a big deal here in France. It is the time of the year when the French return from their July and August holidays and get back into their regular schedules. And like "back to school" in the States, you see references to "la rentrée" everywhere.

For us, it was cool to really experience la rentrée firsthand. When we first arrived in Paris, our neighborhood was really quiet. There weren't many people on the streets and most of the shops had signs saying they would return on August 21st or the 24th, the 27th, etc.

We then went on our brief (by French standards) holiday to Austria, Switzerland, and Lake Annecy. When we returned and participated in our own rentrée, many things were different.

First, we felt like we were home! The apartment that previously felt small suddenly was just fine after spending eleven nights in hotel rooms. Clay went off to his bedroom, Paige to hers, and we all had some quiet time in our personal spaces.

Paris had also changed. It had come alive. The shops were all open and the streets were busy. The weather went from the sweltering heat of August to the brisk mornings and sunny days of September. It has been beautiful.

The last big piece of la rentrée for us is getting the kids back to school -- which will be great for everybody. I am particularly looking forward to establishing my day-to-day routine and having a quiet apartment for much of the day.

Lake Annecy

We knew we were back in France when it took 30 minutes to place an order at lunch.  Not to worry. We were entertained by watching some French grandparents discipline (unrelated) loud bratty kids at another table.  Anyhow we found another great place to hang out on Lake Annecy.  We are at a rustic resort but luckily in a fairly new building with nice 2 bdrm suite/apt, volleyball court, playground, pool, and all kinds of room for kids to romp.  Looking forward to exploring the town more.

I could live here!  Another charming old city on the lake surrounded by mountains, and smaller homey villages just outside of town. Thundershowers the first night and following morning but I was able to walk to the bakery and the kids swam in the indoor pool. Later we strolled through the city.  We happened on an ice cream store with 55 flavors and just had to stop. 

Awoke to snow on the mountains the next day.  It did feel a bit chillier (later in the evening noticed temp was 55) and rain persisted. We started to walk by the lake and were caught in a rainstorm.  Luckily we found a place to go bowling (the last thing I thought I would be doing in France).  We enjoyed savory and sweet crepes for dinner and ate ice cream in the rain.  They have shops with many flavors of ice cream so we just had to try another flavor.  Looked forward to getting back to Paris and warming up.  Time to get out the fall clothes I guess.  Hopefully we will make it back to Lake Annecy another time to bike ride and swim in the lake.

Photos - Annecy

These mountains had snow on them the next day

Photos - Gruyeres

Always making friends

Another great view from our room

Photos - Interlaken / Berner Oberland

View from Room #9 at Sunny Days B&B in Interlaken